wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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