the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
