If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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