Don't you send me to vm
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
