He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
