Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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