i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
