The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
