Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
