Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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