I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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