dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
