no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
