Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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