I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize