Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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