I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
