walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
