You just made me feel so damn special
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
you would pick up someone in the library
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize