Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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