try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
