WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
