I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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