Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
