Heybabeimwearingurpanties
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
