we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
