apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
