Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
ok first of all what the fuck
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
