hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
