Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
