btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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