he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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