yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize
