Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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