Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
