i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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