butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
