"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
