at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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