Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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