I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
