I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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