After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
