I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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