I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
