Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
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