that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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