Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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