Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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