i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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