Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
They have beer where we have blood.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
